hello my pretties,

i keep you tucked away o so secretly don't i? in the spare rooms of my heart you're kept: packed tightly, warm and safe. i take great pains to not let anything touch you save for me. but when i attempt to pull you out in my free time you get a little heavier each time. you burn me a little more and bite a little harder. still i let you hurt me. why do i do that? you don't give anything positive back. by no means is it a symbiotic relationship. yet i cling to you, my torturers. someday you may be my executioners. i trick myself into thinking that is impossible, but is it? you are my treasures and precious to me. i give you much of myself... too much. today i've pulled you out of my heart to examine you every which way, like jewels. i look at you like i'm staring at pictures and reliving old memories. you just have not crystallized and those memories are yet to be made. still i play with you like you are all real: in the sun, under the moon, over my books, on my pillow, through my studies, and around my work. every night i must leave you my dears to the conscious world as i sleep. but helplessly i am visited by you now in the land of unconsciousness also. therefore now of my own free will i put you back in your haven in my heart, but i know you'll come to me soon as you have before and will again. so goodnight my dreams.